HALLELUJAH! Finally some football, but will somebody please tell the cricketers to have a spell? Haven't they heard of overkill?
Before a shot is fired in anger at the weekend, there's this crazy custom to be observed. Everybody can have a go.
It's called "pick the final eight".
I could only manage five last year. I overestimated the Cowboys, Sharks and Warriors. I'll leave the Sharks out again; they can't score tries. And the Warriors are also out; they'll miss the little general's ring craft.
The Cowboys are a puzzle. Neil Henry is a quality coach, they have the Australian halfback and an absolute match winner in Matt Bowen at fullback behind a potentially strong pack. Their recent results have been bewildering.
One thing you can bank on, the eight never stays the same from one year to the next, so you have to figure out which teams to leave out from last year, then find their replacements.
If you've wondered why it's so hard to pick the top eight these days, it might help to know the salary cap has so evened the field that every one of the 16 teams has made the eight this decade, but even more remarkably, every team except South Sydney has made the top four.
Given that the premiership is won from the top four - no one has won it from below fourth for 15 years - it means that every team except Rusty's Rabbits have been positioned for a crack at the title at least once in the decade to 2009. That's quite a cyclic turnover.
In fairness to the Bunnies, they weren't readmitted to the competition until 2002 and it's taken time to rebuild.
English import Sam Burgess and ex-Bronco Dave Taylor have been great off-season acquisitions for the pack, but I'm not including them in my eight for two reasons: poor defensive "reads" by the outside backs and too high a percentage of thoughtless last-play options. Buying two forwards won't fix those glaring problems.
Anyway, this list of the number of top four appearances in the last 10 years shows how often each of the 15 teams were positioned for a shot at the title: Brisbane 5, Bulldogs 5, Roosters 5, Melbourne 4, Newcastle 4, Parramatta 2, Canberra 2, Cronulla 2, Manly 2, Penrith 2, St George 2, Warriors 2, North Queensland 1, Tigers 1, Gold Coast 1.
So despite criticisms of the cap, it has staved off bankruptcy in a few clubs and delivered the obvious benefit of a turnover of teams and a week-to-week unpredictability which is indicative of a very healthy competition.
Anyway, let's get on with the job at hand. Here's the order in which they arrived at the play-offs last year: St George, Bulldogs, Gold Coast, Melbourne, Manly, Brisbane, Newcastle and Parramatta. All eight won't make it this year. They never do. So who stays and who misses out?
For the exercise, I'll pick a top five, get rid of a bottom five and wrestle with the six in the middle. My top five, in no particular order, are: Bulldogs, St George, Melbourne, Gold Coast and Parramatta. Bottom five: Cronulla, Canberra, Newcastle, Warriors and Tigers.
That leaves three to pick from the six in the middle.
Manly, Brisbane, North Queensland, Penrith, Roosters and South Sydney.
I've already indicated that the Bunnies are off my list, so it's three from five.
However, just a word on Parramatta. They've been installed as early season favourites to take the title, mostly on the basis of their breathtaking finish from eighth last year, plus the addition of Timana Tahu, Justin Poore and Shane Shackleton.
I've included them in my top five, but it's hard to forget how unimpressive their efforts were during the year.
Their coach, Daniel Anderson, should alert them to the statistical importance of making the top four. They can't loaf during the year and expect to win it with a late-season flurry.
I'm leaving Manly out, more for the off-field distractions than the uncertainty over the success of the halves. This competition is so close, no team can give the field a start.
Brisbane are in my eight, but only just. They've been in since Dally Messenger was a ball boy and I'm not about to suggest they can't get there, but this year might be touch and go for them. As long as Darren Lockyer can hop on one leg, they should be there in September.
Penrith make my eight. They're my tip as this season's bolters. This young team, wrapped around veterans Petero Civoniceva and Luke Lewis, has been a work in progress for some time by coach Matthew Elliott. I've got a hunch they're about to deliver the goods.
The last spot goes to King Henry's Cowboys. I initially thought the Roosters would be there, but mathematics precludes me from including them.
They'll rise from the ashes under the new regime at Bondi Junction but I think they'll be like the Tigers - they'll go close, but no cigar in 2010.
So there it is: Bulldogs, St George, Melbourne, Gold Coast, Parramatta, Penrith, Brisbane and North Queensland.
But don't worry, if the team you support isn't there - I never get eight out of eight.
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