VIDEO: The Beards get a bit hairy

THEY formed for a one-off gig, their name and songs inspired by the beards they wore at rehearsal. But seven years and three albums later, The Beards just keep on growing.


LIVE spoke with band member Facey McStubblington, pictured left, ahead of the band’s Having a Beard is the New Not Having a Beard tour, which includes a show at Newcastle’s Great Northern Hotel on Wednesday.

McStubblington told LIVE the band – which also includes Johann Beardraven, Nathaniel Beard and John Beardman jnr – formed from another band which needed a support act.

‘‘We were a different band first for about five years and we needed to get a support act for an EP launch that we were doing and we did all the numbers and we couldn’t afford to get another band,’’ he said.

‘‘One day at rehearsal we all had beards because it was a Sunday and we were all hung-over and dishevelled and we thought, why not make up a band to support ourselves, and The Beards were born.’’ In the years since, the band has amassed fans the country and world over – they played at the 2009 World Beard and Moustache Championships in Alaska – and written three albums just about beards, including songs such as You Should Consider Having Sex with a Bearded Man, If Your Dad Doesn’t Have A Beard, You’ve Got Two Mums and No Beard, No Good.

Though the members have an obvious devotion to facial hair, McStubblington admits the members have had periods without beards.

But there is no hesitation when asked what would happen if one of the members wanted to be clean-shaven on a regular basis.

‘‘I can tell you confidently that they would be gone, see you later, pack your bags.

‘‘It’s a legally binding contract we’ve signed with one another now whereby if anyone deliberately shaves off their beard they’re out of the band and publicly humiliated,’’ he said.

‘‘You’ve just got to be patient, boys without beards, and women, we put it to you that you’re just not waiting long enough. A lot of people suggest to us that gender is a boundary, but my grandmother has quite the beard and she just waited until she was 76. So there’s hope.’’

McStubblington recommended a few famous beards to aspire to, including those of Cat Stevens, Kenny Rogers and Gandalf (from The Lord Of The Rings), and not forgetting Charles Darwin and Jesus.

For the record, the band would be open to the addition of a bearded lady.

‘‘Yeah, I think that would be fantastic. It would probably be problematic in that all four of us would be targeting her from a romantic point of view.’’

Still on the female front, McStubblington told LIVE the band had an unexpected fan in pop star Ke$ha, who like many of The Beards’ fans, got a little up close and personal.

‘‘We’re not standard rock stars that pick up with the whole sex, drugs, rock ’n’ roll, that’s not the type of people we attract.

‘‘People that come along do love beards and love to cop a feel,’’ he said.

‘‘In our last gig in Sydney Ke$ha had come along specifically to meet us and feel our beards because she’s a pogonophile and she loves beards. She came backstage and we didn’t really know who she was and she put our beards in her mouth and really got into it. And then she was right up front for the whole gig and pulled me into the crowd at one point.’’

But McStubblington said it’s not just pop stars who need a bit of beard in their life.

‘‘Society is yearning for The Beards, we just sort of put it out there to be honest for just one gig to support the band and we just kept getting booked because people need it, people need it in their lives. You [the reader] need us [The Beards],’’ he said.

Catch The Beards at the Great Northern Hotel on Wednesday (April 18). Tickets at Oztix.

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